This blog series is my offering to you, a chance to see how Ayurveda is weaved into my life & how you can apply these principles to your own life.

INHABITING (part II)

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For the first time this blog didn’t flow in the usual way. I decided that inhabiting was still very much topical for me and that I would continue to write about it. That was until I sat down to write.

I started and stopped, started then stopped again. This wasn’t how it worked. Something felt off, I wasn’t sure what or why. I didn’t know how to describe what I wanted to say. The writing would not be come, it resisted. So I just sat with it.

Lots of things came up.

Ironically my body found a way of telling me about some things. I had what I call a digestive disturbance! After meeting friends for lunch I came home feeling completely bloated and unwell. I had allowed myself a coffee and then had a veggie burger (with visible beans and vegetables -not some squished up mush) with some chips. I can only summise that the chip fat was left over from the weekend, or maybe the chips and their fat were left over from the weekend. My digestion is strong and normally allows an odd deviation but not this time. I felt dreadful, bloated, nauseous and exhausted. I had a digestive tea (cumin, coriander and fennel) and went to bed at 6pm! What a lesson that was.

Since then I have been on a mini reset. Nothing particularly restrictive but rather limiting the ingredients I use. Switching them up to create some nourishing meals. Apples, pears and nectarines to make stewed fruit and then spelt and wheat flour or rice for my grains, split mung or green beans for my legume and lots of green vegetables. It has been practice of creativity for sure but I am feeling lighter and brighter. Proof that a few simple changes make a huge difference.

Life has transformed in some fairly big ways over recent years. The obvious one is my retirement from corporate life to studying and training to become an Ayurvedic health advisor. Then on to founding Inner Nourishment. Not a small change! But having ‘retired’ I found myself still feeling too busied.

Only now am I seeing, or more understanding, what that means for me. It has taken a fair amount of decompressing but I also carried over many of my Pitta traits to my new world. My study plan was a colour coded spreadsheet tracker, reviewed and updated weekly. Then came the content planning then the program mapping – how would they sit neatly together, not just some random training material. I was still very much in ‘doing’ mode. The transition from the Pitta life stage of leading, driving and achieving still in play as I entered the Vata stage where life should be taken at a slower more intentional pace, with spaciousness and time for creativity (and wafting!).

This work needs to feel inhabited too. Not another chore or duty to fulfil. And that to some extent has been part of the problem. The Facebook group become another thing on the to do list that didn’t feel natural – and certainly not aligned with how I wanted to spend my days.

With my Trilogy completed my days have become freer, to waft and to create but mostly to embody Ayurveda more fully. In Overcoming Wellness Fatigue I talk about wellbeing not being a tick list and that is where I am. Living Ayurveda fully.

On the work front I have not only closed down my group but actively stepped back from posting. My permanent static grid on Instagram provides window into my offerings and I am just posting as life happens.

That shift has changed this enormously, no more checking for comments or questions, no constant planning or feeling slightly resentful that Herbie has gone into play mode while I am in the middle of drafting something. My social media presence happens when it happens. And Herbie remains highly featured in that!!

With Love

Claire

I can now sit back and allow that to flow, not just my content but the time spent there. I have a new relationship with Instagram in particular – my feed has become a beautiful scroll – bloomscrolling as my dear friend Helene taught me! I always new social media wasn’t about followers and likes for me but I have struggled with how visibility is dictated by algorithms. True Ayurveda isn’t always aesthetically pleasing, my life isn’t particularly aesthetically pleasing but that’s not the point is it? My life is about how I feel and that can barely be captured in words let alone a photo or reel.

I do sometimes find myself feeling a little jarred by how seemingly easy some accounts attract such large followings in the Ayurvedic world. I accept these often make Ayurveda palatable for the masses not just aesthetically but also in practices. ‘how to drink your coffee’ springs to mind. Nope, coffee is never Ayurvedic but I understand that helping people with their habits doesn’t render the practitioner inauthentic – just more Western I suppose. And of course having some Ayurvedic practices or habits is better than having none. So I am working on letting those moments wash over me, not getting caught up in their world and remain focused on what matters to me. Judgement does not serve me.

There is no inclination in me to follow along, I am not seeking likes and such. And I get to choose not to use my capacity and energy to show up online in this way. Inner Nourishment is exactly what is says. Inner wins for me over outer!

Right now my inhabiting is working beautifully. My wafting era is in full flow.

June’s Nourish and Flourish was proving problematic for a few members and the heatwave was in full flow so we decided to not meet. Instead my lovely friend Sarah and I made a spontaneous decision for meet for a walk along the ‘beach’ in old Leigh. Utter bliss, we had a paddle, sat on the sand chatting and rounded things off with a drink on the deck at the Boatyard. Our conversation was nourishing and sometimes deep. In a recent conversation Sarah left me with a question that I am still contemplating. I told her that I didn’t like using the term ‘me time’, I think it sounds a little selfish. Sarah’s question was why does it matter if it is selfish? Mmm….that I didn’t have an answer for. I like to refer to it as rejuvenation because to me that is exactly what it is. This is what it represents for me. I am finding rejuvenate one’s Self becomes far more essential as we move into the Vata stage of life. I am not ready to dry up before my time, my intention is to age with a certain amount of grace but mostly with vitality and perhaps a little aplomb!

That said I am still not fully ready to answer Sarah’s question, some further contemplation needed….

What I do have clarity on is my ability to choose. I get to choose, daily. This is not just about how I show up in life but about every choice I make. And that is the important part. Of course life’s dynamics mean I am not in control of what happens in life but I am in control about how I react and how I process life. The guiding principle of Ayurveda is cause and effect. My choices matter and in order to live a Sattvic life I am careful about what I expose my mind and body to. My unresolved Dharma question begins to answer itself. My purpose doesn’t have to involve high rewards and flashy milestones. I am reminded that a simple life should be normalised more often. That not everything needs to be shared, a quiet and stress free life is what I have worked towards and now I get to live it fully.

I could document my life more fully than I do but surely the best thing you can do for yourSelf is live your own life fully too. Mine isn’t always exciting but it is full of joy, peace and lots of love (and sometime a little bit of crazy!)

Life is not about comparison, sharing yes but only to enhance and enrich.

So while my programs are out there for those looking for formal support and guidance I will continue to educate through sharing. My life inhabited with education through action.

I am giving myself permission to live fully. To live for my own needs rather than just those of my family and friends. It raises thoughts about why, as women, we are unfailing in our ability to nurture those around us but don’t always allow ourSelf the time we deserve too. They are not exclusive. These two things can operate alongside each other. I would say that I get better with practice but it isn’t always easy.. My aim is for this balance to work effortlessly which may, for now, mean a little effort is required. More to come on this, more to explore and experiment with.

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